One of the most common things I hear in therapy is: “I don’t even know what I need.” At first, many people are surprised by this. They know what other people need. They can anticipate the emotions of a partner, child, coworker, or friend before those individuals say a word. They are dependable, thoughtful, and deeply attuned to others. But when I ask, “What do you need right now?” they’re met with silence. Not because they don’t care about themselves. Because somewhere along

Have you ever made a decision, felt reasonably confident about it, and then spent the next several hours—or days—questioning whether you made the right choice? Maybe you replayed the conversation. Reviewed your options again. Asked multiple people for their opinions. Looked for reassurance online. Or imagined every possible outcome before finally arriving right back where you started. If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many people assume difficulty making decisions is

Most people assume anxiety is caused by fearful thoughts. While thoughts certainly play a role, anxiety is often maintained by something much less obvious: the behaviors we use to feel safe. These are known as safety behaviors—actions designed to reduce anxiety, prevent discomfort, or protect us from feared outcomes. The challenge is that while these behaviors may provide temporary relief, they often reinforce the very fears we’re trying to escape. What Are Safety Behaviors?